Shambles

Clamoring clematises, what has my world come to?
So much working the machine is oiled and spinning
Look ahead and see the future
Everything lies in shambles and the carnage reaches through the wormhole
Grabbing back at me after I've run so far away
Nothing ever good comes of this so why do I do this?
Stuck in limbo the lingo remains the same old filth
Generic and geriatric what is new has been old hat forever
Born of a new fire and a hot zeal
Set the seal upon the letter and rehash old wounds
Suddenly I can remember so many things that I blacked out
Only to wake in cold sweats remembering back to what I fought so hard that I should only hold as forgot
The saw is the law and I hear it grinding in the distance
Rails run off the road and back towards my eyes
This new era of corruption has tangible signs of the old
Must the world end like it has always been
Sick children lining the streets with laments to shut heavens
Mercy seats no longer hold the feet of enthroned powers
Divinity seems to stop and take a look back
Revealing that who were praying to all this time was a demon in priestly robes
Light the incenses of sacrilege and fall under the power of the black mass
This is not me and it never was
I was a fighter and now I spew help to the wretched
What has my life become that the darkness is clearing and I no longer have the conscious left to kill?
Soft is all, I've become a little soft
But to take in the widow and the orphan
Never before have I shown this type of philanthropy
Yet I feel it calling like the smoke from a distant inferno
Everything will burn up and I'll go back to nothing
Fears take hold and the chains return
How I had to fight to let these things go
Worried for the first time ever and trying so hard to not to be a fuck up
All the ancient internalized words haunt my thoughts
Maybe this is why I am remembering
Because the curse really isn't lifted and I'm still stuck
Waking up in hell again at least I gave it shot
Big decisions lay just beyond the horizon  
What does it take to overcome and this I'll never know
It was all worth trying let's see if someone can make sense of this rambling